This week I am blessed to step away from “regular life” with my husband to go skiing in the mountains. SO PUMPED! It is a much needed break from the hustle and bustle of work and routine.
We may not have little kiddos running around at our ankles yet, but life still gets filled up with to-dos, work functions…well work in general, everyday chores, events on the calendar, time on the phone (not just talking these days since we have smart phones) and then the desire for brain-dead relaxation in the evenings. And since I am a task oriented person (in addition to being a people-person, figure that one out!), it is hard for me to walk away from something without finishing it.
Sometimes walking away from it all to spend time with PEOPLE is key to having healthy relationships and a healthy lifestyle. So, my husband and I are blessed with this time away from our lives at home to spend time with just one another, somewhere high on a snow-covered mountain, speeding down on wooden poles, hopefully avoiding trees. Besides the sport of it, I am also looking forward to the opportunity for us to work on our communication. I’ve found it is easy to become lazy in spouse communication as we get settled in life. I’ve also found this to be very dangerous in our relationship, or any relationship for that matter.
There are many verses in the Bible that talk about healthy communication, so I’m just going to highlight a few.
“Let no unwholesome word proceed from your mouth, but only such a word as is good for edification according to the need of the moment, so that it will give grace to those who hear.” Ephesians 4:29
“Anxiety in a man’s heart weighs it down, But a good word makes it glad.” Proverbs 12:25
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, But a harsh word stirs up anger. A tongue of the wise makes knowledge acceptable, But the mouth of fools spouts folly.” Proverbs 15:1-2
“A man has joy in an apt answer, and how delightful is a timely word!” Proverbs 15:23
“He who gives an answer before he hears, it is folly and shame to him.” Proverbs 18:3
Of course, nonverbal communication is very important in a relationship, too. Actions sometimes speak louder than words, and other times they accompany words in a way that tells the whole story. A great example of an action in the Bible is when Jesus washed the disciples’ feet (John 13:1-17), ultimately demonstrating servanthood and teaching His disciples to do the same.
It never hurts to take a little break, escaping from regular routine, to step back and examine your own relationships and how you communicate with those in your life. It takes regular work to communicate, but it is worth every minute. So we’ll enjoy our little escape from “reality” to take time together and catch up on our communication skills (since we have a long drive and lots of hours together!). And I pray you are able to do the same, whether it is a couple of hours to reconnect with a loved one or a whole trip!
“Finally, brethren, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is of good repute, if there is any excellence and if anything worthy of praise, dwell on these things. The things you have learned and received and heard and seen in me, practice these things, and the God of peace will be with you.” Philippians 4:8-9
And remember, your perspective will influence how you communicate with those loved ones. So keep a heavenly perspective, and don’t let it get twisted by the world’s influences.